What if you’re already there?

Getting off the spiritual hamster wheel

Hello Beautiful Soul,

Have you had any of these thoughts come up lately?

“I’m still not there yet. When will this ever end?”

“I thought I had healed this. Why is this coming up again?”

“I’ve tried everything, and nothing has changed. There must be something wrong with me.”

There’s a part of us that is always looking to change—to feel better, to become someone better, to get somewhere better. And there’s nothing wrong with that in and of itself… after all, it’s in our nature to keep growing and expanding. We dream. We set goals. We envision the life and the world we’d like to create.

Where this gets us in trouble, however, is when we let the mind convince us that we’re not okay until the circumstances change. That we are not worthy until we are completely healed.

“I’ll be free when I can walk again.”

“I’ll accept myself when my skin has finally cleared.”

“I’ll feel secure when I’m making $100,000 a year.”

“I’ll be happy when I meet the love of my life and have 3 kids.”

Again, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting these things. But as soon as we become attached to the outcome, we’ve made our happiness conditional. In fact, we’re actively pushing happiness away by saying “I can’t be happy until this happens.” It’s like we’re waiting for our life to start.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve caught myself slipping into this over the course of my journey. Then one day it finally dawned on me that I’ll never arrive, and I’ll never be good enough. Not in the way the mind thinks I need to, anyway.

And the funny thing is, this liberated me—to finally see the game that my sweet mind has been playing with me this whole time, dangling that carrot in front of me. Because now I could make a choice to stop chasing that carrot—to get off that hamster wheel of never-ending self-improvement.

So the next time those thoughts of “I’m not good enough” and “I’m not there yet” come up again, I invite you to try this with me:

Just put a hand on your heart and breathe.

Soften and feel your body.

In this moment, you have already arrived.

You are already here, now.

There’s nowhere else to be, because you are the center of your Universe.

Now is the only moment there is.

So would you be willing to be happy NOW, instead of waiting for things to change?

Would you be willing to love and accept yourself fully, just the way you are NOW?

Would you be willing to welcome everything that’s here now, including these thoughts of unworthiness and how painful they feel?

And what if that’s the only reason why these thoughts and feelings come up—to be seen, heard, and accepted by the love that you are?

What if healing really isn’t a destination, but a moment-by-moment choice to embrace what is?

Here’s to your rising.

xox